Meta employees sue over use of AI in workforce reduction - Courthouse News

Meta, the company that brought you the metaverse and a very expensive CEO, has now deployed AI to fire people more efficiently. Twenty-six unnamed employees are suing, claiming internal systems like Metamate and keystroke monitoring were used to single out colleagues on protected leave. Because nothing says 'we care about our workforce' like a chatbot that flags your sick days for termination. Metamate: the AI best friend who rats you out to HR, presumably with a friendly 'I noticed you took a mental health day—mind if I add you to the layoff list?'

This isn't a glitch; it's a feature. Meta's workforce reduction strategy apparently involved running keystroke logs and algorithmically identifying who was on leave, then neatly bundling them into the cuts. It's like having a digital tip-off system that ensures only the employees already dealing with serious life events get the axe. Efficiency! The plaintiffs remain unnamed, perhaps because they're worried Metamate will follow them to their next job.

So let's mark this as the logical endpoint of the 'move fast and break things' era. Now instead of breaking things, you break people's lives—but with an AI to do the paperwork. If this isn't a class-action lawsuit waiting to happen, I'll eat my hat. But knowing Meta's legal team, they'll probably settle with a cheeky 'we're sorry you felt that way' and a Metamate apology update.