Microsoft patches record number of security vulnerabilities, citing its use of AI - TechCrunch

Microsoft has announced it patched a record 570 security flaws in July 2026, and it's absolutely chuffed about it — crediting its own AI for finding so many. The company proudly expects future monthly patches to climb even higher, which is a bit like a plumber celebrating that they've discovered more leaks in your house than last time. The implication, of course, is that Microsoft's software is a colander, and AI is just the ladle that's revealing just how many holes there are. 'Look how many bugs we found!' they cheer, as if finding them were the problem rather than having them in the first place.

The corporate messaging is a masterclass in spin: 'Our AI-driven security tools are uncovering previously undiscovered vulnerabilities.' Translation: 'Our code has always been this Swiss-cheesy; we just couldn't be bothered to look properly before.' The 570 figure isn't just a number — it's a confession. Every one of those flaws existed in shipped products, potentially exploitable for who knows how long. But hey, at least the AI is good at finding them after the fact, which is the technological equivalent of locking the stable door after the horse has bolted, then installing a camera to watch the next horse bolt.

And what of the future? Microsoft expects monthly patches to 'be higher' — a euphemism that should terrify anyone running Windows Server or Azure. The AI is getting better at discovery, which means the patch Tuesday deluge will become a flood. The real question is whether Microsoft will ever get ahead of the curve, or if we're just entering an era where AI finds bugs faster than humans can fix them. At this rate, the only thing more vulnerable than Microsoft's software is the administration's belief that more patches equals better security. Cheers to progress — or at least to job security for IT admins.