ASML restructures workforce, lets go 1700

So ASML, the Dutch lithography giant that essentially has a monopoly on the machines needed to make advanced chips, is slashing 1,700 jobs. That's right — the company that prints the very silicon brains of the AI revolution has decided that 1,700 people are surplus to requirements. But don't worry, they're also planning to create about 1,400 new engineering jobs, which is mathematically suspicious — a net loss of 300 positions — but hey, optics! It's the classic corporate *bait-and-switch*: 'we're not cutting jobs, we're *restructuring*.'

The timing is impeccable, of course. ASML's CEO Christophe Fouquet has been touting the company's role as the backbone of the AI era — because what's a booming industry without a bit of collateral damage? This follows the delightful pattern we've seen before with Meta and others: frame layoffs as 'efficiency' and call the net loss a 'transition.' The 1,400 new engineering roles are conveniently described as supporting 'growth areas,' which presumably does not include the 1,700 people who now get to experience that growth from the outside.

And let's not forget the context: ASML's 2026 first-quarter bookings hit €3.6 billion — a 44% drop year-on-year — but hey, AI is the future! The disconnect between the hype and the reality is so wide you could fit an entire semiconductor fab in it. So raise a glass to the 1,700 — the first sacrifices on the altar of 'restructuring.' At least they're being let go by a company that literally cannot stop making money from its monopoly. Progress, everyone!